781: Bonni and Dave Reflect on Recent Episodes

In this reflective episode of Coaching for Leaders, hosts Dave Stachowiak and Bonnie Stachowiak revisit three recent episodes that have resonated deeply with their audience and personal leadership journeys. They dive into Margaret Andrews' episode 750 on 'Six Questions Every Leader Should Ask About Themselves,' with Dave responding to the question 'What does success look like for you?' and Bonnie exploring 'What feedback have you received over the years about how your actions and behaviors impact others?' Their conversation unfolds with vulnerability and insight, touching on the joy of helping others succeed, the importance of psychological safety, and the careful curation of feedback—especially in organizational contexts. They reflect on the risks of sharing raw 360 feedback and advocate for leaders to shape their own narratives rather than leaving them to be interpreted by others. The episode concludes with a poignant meditation on leadership as a deeply human endeavor, drawing parallels between parenting, service, and the timeless desire to be 'of use'—a theme inspired by Marge Piercy’s poem 'To Be Of Use.' The hosts emphasize that leadership is not just about strategy or efficiency, but about presence, purpose, and connection in the moment. Key takeaways include: 1) True success is measured by how well you help others succeed; 2) Feedback should be curated and framed to guide growth, not overwhelm; 3) Leaders must protect psychological safety by modeling vulnerability and clarity; 4) The most meaningful leadership often happens in the quiet, personal spaces—like parenting or volunteering—not just boardrooms; 5) To be 'of use' means embracing messy, real work that serves a greater good; 6) Leaders should lead with intentionality in how they share feedback, especially in high-stakes environments; 7) Self-reflection is not a luxury but a core leadership practice; 8) The best leadership stories are not about perfection, but about presence, growth, and shared rhythm with others. The episode is marked by warmth, honesty, and a deep sense of purpose, reflecting a mature, grounded approach to leadership that values humanity over performance.