Savage Lovecast Episode 1014

In this episode of the Savage Lovecast, Dan Savage dives into two major political sex scandals: the fallout from former DHS head Kristi Noem's husband Brian Noem's revealed fetish for humiliation through paid sex workers, and the sexual misconduct allegations against Democratic Congressman Eric Swalwell. Savage expresses a partisan bias, welcoming the downfall of a Republican hypocrite while demanding higher ethical standards from Democrats, especially on issues of sexual misconduct. He argues that Democrats must hold themselves to higher norms, even as Republicans face no consequences for similar behavior. The episode then shifts to listener questions, including a lesbian who wants to know a man's cologne scent without seeming flirtatious, a woman grappling with her ex's secret hookup during their reconciliation, and a submissive navigating conflicting orders from two dominant partners. Savage advises finding the husband's wife to discreetly inquire about the scent, interprets the ex's secrecy as a sign of care, and suggests gamifying the conflict between dominant partners with pre-agreed punishments. He also addresses the normality of finding people attractive, the challenges of developing sexuality after trauma, postpartum libido loss, and the complexities of maintaining close friendships with former romantic partners. Throughout, Savage emphasizes honesty, communication, and self-compassion.