Savage Lovecast Episode 1013
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Dan Savage opens the 1013th episode of the Savage Lovecast with a fiery critique of the Daily Mail’s coverage of Brian Noem, husband of fired DHS Secretary Kristi Noem, who was exposed for engaging in online fetish chats involving cross-dressing and fake breasts. Savage expresses outrage not for Noem’s sake, but for the timing—breaking just after Noem’s firing and during a week when Savage had already recorded his podcast, leaving him unable to respond in real time. He contrasts the media’s treatment of conservative figures with how they’d react to similar scandals involving Democrats, accusing Republicans of only caring about issues that personally affect them. The episode then shifts to listener calls: a woman who saw a porn video of an old friend and wonders if she should warn her; a man questioning etiquette at a bathhouse over using a public sling; a woman upset that her unemployed friend was pressured to pay for a destination bachelorette party; and a man seeking advice on deepening sexual communication with his GGG wife, who enjoys kink and pegging. Savage encourages the caller to embrace their shared journey, calling it a 'pegging success.' Finally, a woman seeks guidance on navigating sexual incompatibility with a younger, inexperienced, neurodivergent partner, and Savage urges her to be honest about her needs—even if it risks losing him—because long-term compatibility requires mutual growth, not performance. The episode closes with listener feedback and promotion for the Hump 2026 Spring Tour.
Don’t warn someone about a porn video of them unless you’re re-establishing a friendship—otherwise, it can retraumatize them.
In public sex spaces, it’s not rude to ask someone to vacate a shared device like a sling—be courteous, but don’t let others squat on your pleasure.
Destination bachelorette parties that expect unemployed friends to subsidize costs are exploitative and a red flag for toxic friendship dynamics.
A partner’s willingness to explore kink (like pegging or shared panties) is a sign of sexual generosity, not shyness—celebrate it.
Honest, direct communication about sexual needs—even about penis size or toy use—is essential for long-term compatibility.
…and 3 more takeaways available in PodZeus
The Daily Mail’s Brian Noem Scandal and the Hypocrisy of Conservative Media
“If we learned this week that Gavin Newsom was into bimbofication or that John Ossoff was into sissification... Republicans would be telling us that those pictures of Gavin Newsom in that pink skirt were proof that all Democrats are perverts.”
Should You Warn an Old Friend About a Porn Video of Them?
“If you do stumble over something, porn online, that an old friend is in, you should just assume the best, cross your fingers, hope they know, hope it turns them on and stay the fuck out of it.”
Bathhouse Etiquette: Is It Rude to Ask Someone to Vacate a Public Sling?
“Don’t squat. Don’t just sit there on a piece of machinery that somebody else might be waiting to use. Be courteous, be conscientious.”
The Ethics of Destination Bachelorette Parties and Financial Exploitation
“Fuck destination weddings. Fuck destination rehearsal dinners. Fuck destination bachelor and bachelorette parties. I mean, I've always kind of hated what bachelor and bachelorette parties mean...”
Navigating Kink and Communication in a Monogamous Relationship
“You are hashtag blessed. You have a very GGG wife who has been willing to go there with and for you...”
“You risk losing him. But you will definitely lose him. You will get rid of him at some point if he can't satisfy you and you have to pretend that he's enough.”
“If we learned this week that Gavin Newsom was into bimbofication or that John Ossoff was into sissification... Republicans would be telling us that those pictures of Gavin Newsom in that pink skirt were proof that all Democrats are perverts.”
“The only way this might work out is if you risk scaring him the fuck off. And if saying all that shit scares him the fuck off, well, good riddance.”
Host
Guest
Dan Savage
person
Kristi Noem
person
Brian Noem
person
Daily Mail
organization
Helix Sleep
organization
Eli McCann
person
Squarespace
organization
Blueland
organization
Alexander Preddy
person
Hump 2026 Spring Tour
other
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