On the Couch – Rachel Kolisi on her new memoir Falling Forward
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In this intimate and powerful episode of *Lunch with Pippa Hudson*, Rachel Kolisi and co-author Zibu Sitole discuss *Falling Forward*, Rachel’s deeply personal memoir that chronicles her journey through identity loss, divorce, mental health struggles, and the courageous act of rebuilding herself after life-altering upheavals. The conversation unfolds with raw honesty, exploring how Rachel redefined herself beyond the labels of 'first lady of South African rugby' or 'wife,' embracing the idea that identity is fluid and that resilience means staying present, not pushing through pain. The book, co-written with Zibu Sitole, emerged from a demanding but transformative process of early-morning conversations, emotional vulnerability, and mutual trust. Rachel shares her mental health journey, including a suicide attempt at 15, and her decision to disclose past experiences with gender-based violence—not for shock value, but as a tool for healing and advocacy. Both women emphasize the importance of privacy, honoring others even in pain, and the power of storytelling to help others feel less alone. The episode also reflects on the tension between public visibility and personal boundaries, with Rachel balancing her platform with the need to protect her family and herself. Key takeaways include: identity is not fixed and can be rebuilt intentionally; vulnerability is a form of strength; mental health conversations must be normalized; healing from trauma is possible and worth sharing; and setting boundaries is essential for emotional survival. The episode concludes with a profound message: falling forward—moving forward even when unready—is not about perfection, but about progress. The overall tone is deeply empathetic, courageous, and uplifting, celebrating the quiet power of resilience and self-reclamation.
Identity is not fixed—rebuilding after loss is a courageous, intentional act.
Resilience is staying present, not pushing through pain; it’s choosing honesty and rebuilding piece by piece.
Mental health struggles are not a sign of weakness—sharing them saves lives and reduces isolation.
You can honor people who hurt you while still protecting your peace and boundaries.
Falling forward means moving even when unready—progress over perfection.
…and 3 more takeaways available in PodZeus
Introducing Rachel Kolisi and the Power of 'Falling Forward'
“Life will ask things of us that we never planned for and somehow we are still required to keep going. We show up for our children, our work, our faith, our responsibilities often while quietly carrying more than anyone can see.”
Why This Book Now? The Journey to Writing a Memoir
Rachel explains her hesitation to write a memoir due to fear of drama and sensationalism, but shares how the documentary process and the overwhelming number of women reaching out with their own struggles inspired her to finally tell her story. The book was written under a tight deadline, with Zibu Sitole as co-author and emotional anchor.
The Meaning Behind 'Falling Forward' and the Courage to Begin Again
“Falling forward is kind of a representation of that. It's an invitation to move even when you don't necessarily feel ready to.”
Mental Health, Identity, and the Decision to Share Pain
“There's 100% somebody listening either online or here today that deals with the exact same struggle. And because I'm sitting here able to say me too, you feel less alone.”
Navigating Trauma, Privacy, and the Ethics of Storytelling
“I decided to kind of put all the questioning aside and put it in, in the way that I did in not too much detail because again, knowing, you know, there's going to be people very close to me.”
“If that's where you need to be on the floor, on your face. Then be there and go through that. Go through as hard and as horrific and as horrible as that experience is, go through it because on the other side of that, there's going to be a beautiful lesson.”
“There's 100% somebody listening either online or here today that deals with the exact same struggle. And because I'm sitting here able to say me too, you feel less alone.”
“Falling forward is kind of a representation of that. It's an invitation to move even when you don't necessarily feel ready to.”
Host
Guests
Rachel Kolisi
person
Zibu Sitole
person
Falling Forward
book
Pippa Hudson
person
Pan Macmillan
organization
Zola
other
Sia's siblings
person
Pinky
person
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media
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