Mary Kitzmiller Horse Training Q & A, by Farnam for April 2, 2026

In this episode of Horses in the Morning, host Coach Jen and guest Mary Kitzmiller dive deep into horse training principles centered around the foundational concept of 'getting control of the horse's feet'—not just physically, but emotionally and mentally. Mary shares her personal epiphany that true control comes not from forcing movement, but from creating calm, emotional regulation in the horse through mindful, consistent groundwork. She emphasizes that a horse's reactive behaviors—whether crowding, kicking, or refusing to stand still—often stem from the rider’s own unregulated energy and lack of clear boundaries. Using real-life examples from her clinics and personal experiences with horses like Remy and Lucas, Mary demonstrates how subtle cues, body language, and the strategic release of pressure can transform a fractious horse into a calm, confident partner. The episode also features listener questions on crowding, kicking, and mounting block issues, with Mary offering practical, step-by-step solutions rooted in emotional regulation, boundary-setting, and the use of controlled footwork to build trust and safety. The conversation underscores that effective training is less about dominance and more about becoming the calm, reliable leader the horse instinctively seeks. Key takeaways include: 1) Control of the feet is not about force, but about guiding the horse’s emotional state through mindful, consistent cues; 2) Horses often act out because they feel unsafe—your job is to be the safe, predictable leader; 3) Use release and reward to reinforce desired behavior, not punishment; 4) Practice small, repetitive exercises in calm environments before applying them in high-stress situations; 5) For issues like kicking or crowding, focus on controlling the hindquarters or shoulders to redirect energy; 6) Always start with the horse’s emotional state—calmness precedes obedience; 7) The most effective training happens when the rider is emotionally regulated and patient; 8) Small, consistent actions over time create lasting behavioral change. The tone is encouraging, insightful, and deeply practical, with a strong emphasis on empathy, self-awareness, and long-term relationship building with horses.