158 - Tim Burton's Planet of the Apes with Connor Schmidt

In this episode of Prime Mates, hosts Matt Stewart and guest Connor Schmidt dive into Tim Burton's 2001 film *Planet of the Apes*, dissecting its legacy, flaws, and cultural context. The conversation begins with playful banter about geese, cloacas, and Good Friday, before shifting into a deep, often hilarious critique of the film. Connor, who watched the movie recently after a long break from cinema, delivers a scathing assessment: the film is forgettable, visually dated, and lacks the allegorical depth of the original 1968 version. They highlight its weak plot, absurd logic (like a horse-powered spaceship), and over-the-top performances—especially Tim Roth’s manic General Thade and Mark Wahlberg’s underwhelming lead. Despite some praise for Paul Giamatti’s standout role and the practical ape makeup, the duo agree the film fails on nearly every level. They explore the controversial twist ending, where the apes rule Earth not because it’s Earth, but because Thade time-traveled and replaced humanity, a plot point that defies logic and the butterfly effect. The episode wraps with trivia, bloopers, and audience feedback, including a fun fact about wild Barbary macaques in Gibraltar and a viral 'Monkey on the Car' video. The hosts deliver a brutal but entertaining banana score: two out of seven, overripe and slurry-like.