Mohr Stories 562: Greg Fitzsimmons

In this candid and raucous episode of Mohr Stories, comedian Greg Fitzsimmons joins Joe Prano and Kyle for a deep dive into the absurdities of fame, relationships, and the comedy business. The conversation ranges from his early days on the NACA college circuit—where he booked shows for thousands, endured brutal noon performances, and famously posed in a bathing suit for a magazine cover—to his wild sexual exploits with waitresses, massage therapists, and even a woman who bled during a hotel tryst. He shares his philosophy on 'the escape route' after sex, his commitment to abstaining from porn and masturbation since October, and his humorous take on the hierarchy of whorishness—from cheerleaders to OnlyFans. The episode also features a surreal sponsor segment for Blue Chew, a playful jab at the 'eggplant emoji' as a sexual signal, and a touching moment where Greg reflects on his marriage to Charlotte, his family, and his decision to step back from the road. Amid the raunchy humor, there's a quiet undercurrent of wisdom: the realization that success isn't measured by touring, but by presence—being home, being a father, being a man who puts his name on it.