How to Better Regulate Your Emotions | Dr. Marc Brackett

In this comprehensive three-part episode of the Huberman Lab, Dr. Andrew Huberman engages in a profound conversation with Dr. Marc Brackett, a leading authority on emotional intelligence and professor at Yale University. The discussion dismantles the myth that emotion regulation means suppressing or eliminating emotions, instead reframing it as the skillful use of emotions to achieve personal and professional goals. Brackett emphasizes that emotions are neither inherently good nor bad—what matters is how we relate to them and express them in context. He explores the developmental, cultural, and gendered influences on emotional expression, particularly how boys and men are often socialized to suppress vulnerability, leading to long-term emotional dysregulation. Drawing on science and personal experience, Brackett introduces powerful tools like the 'metamoment'—a deliberate pause to reflect on one’s best self before reacting—and underscores the importance of accurate emotional labeling, cognitive reappraisal, and co-regulation. He also addresses the politicization of emotional intelligence, defending it as a strategic, resilience-building practice essential for thriving in complex relationships and high-pressure environments, not a sign of fragility. The episode culminates in a deeply personal reflection on emotional safety, connection, and the lasting impact of supportive relationships. Brackett shares a poignant story about his uncle Marvin, whose steady, non-judgmental presence provided emotional stability during a traumatic childhood, illustrating how presence and availability are foundational to healing. The conversation closes with gratitude and a call to action, encouraging listeners to support science-based education through subscriptions, reviews, and engagement with the Huberman Lab ecosystem. Throughout, the episode promotes a holistic, evidence-based approach to emotional intelligence—one that combines self-awareness, identity formation (like building a 'fitness identity' for emotions), storytelling, and curiosity to reduce polarization and foster authentic connection. The overall tone is uplifting and empowering, emphasizing that emotional regulation is not about perfection but about growth, resilience, and meaningful human engagement.